John Donne, an English poet once said, “No man is an island.” If so, then why are you alone? Why do you only cook for yourself? Why do you binge-watch all your favorite Netflix films and Kdramas all by yourself and have no one to share with your crazy day experience? Have you thought of that? If you haven’t, then I believe the facts below will enlighten you.
1. People leave you because you are too controlling
Everybody wants freedom. So controlling someone is a big no, because it creates a toxic environment where a person could feel that he or she is imprisoned.
Just imagine yourself told every time that “This is what you are supposed to do. Don’t do this, don’t do that.” For sure you will also be so frustrated and annoyed, right?
Being a control freak provokes anger in the person you are with. And when there is anger it results in a conflict. If there is conflict it could then end up to a fight that will lead to separation which implies that you have been left out.
2. People leave you because you don’t listen
As William Ury said in his speech “The Power of Listening,” in TEDx, we usually don’t listen because we are too occupied by a lot of things that we don’t have the mental and emotional space to be able to truly listen to the other side. We are so eager in thinking of a response that we forget to pause and understand what is being said.
If you don’t want people to leave, then learn to listen. You are not the only person in this world, so don’t be full of yourself. Your ears should be open to the thoughts and opinions of others. For in life, if you want to be listened to, you have to listen too.
“Do unto others what you want others to do unto you” - The Golden Rule, Confucius
3. People leave you because they want to
It is not always your fault why people leave you. Sometimes people leave because they just simply want to. This usually happens when the other person involved wants to seek his true happiness and purpose in life. And we all know that doing so is not easy that is why people like them would rather let you go than hurt you more. So do not blame yourself too much and let yourself be in pain and deep sorrow because it is not you, it is them.
I know that reading this would probably make you uneasy, but truth be told that it is not my intention. I just want to remind you to be mindful of your actions because you might be hurting someone right now or the other way around. You might be the one who is hurting right now and is finding reasons why people have left you so that you can have closure.
If you are either of the two, I hope you found answers to your questions. But if you haven’t found it yet, don’t feel bad, because I tell you, if people leave, that means in the first place they are not meant to be with you forever. They are just “Passers” who are put in your life to give you lessons that will help you in becoming the better version of yourself.
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References
This is the reason why people leave your life -. (2017, October 29). Nesta Jojoe Erskine - Speaker. Writer. Life Enthusiast. https://bit.ly/366V5Xm.
Relationships: The 6 reasons people leave (And how to avoid it happening to yours). (2020, August 17). Hey Sigmund. https://bit.ly/3q1ZrXz.
Confucius: The golden rule: Freedman, Russell, Clement, Frederic: 9780439139571: Amazon.com: Books. (n.d.). Amazon.com: Online Shopping for Electronics, Apparel, Computers, Books, DVDs & more. https://amzn.to/3oasWFd.
Ha, T. (2016, June 24). John donne’s solemn 400-year-old poem against isolationism is resonating today. Quartz. https://bit.ly/39dGYS9.
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